Families are under attack. This is no surprise. The work of destroying families began a long time ago. And, sadly, there doesn’t seem to be too much of a fight to keep families together. I want to change this statistic. I want you to want to change this statistic.
I don’t want to clog this post up with the multitude of information that support this statement. If you are alive and have minimal observation skills you don’t need a third eye to know this to be true.
The rate of decline of the family has increased in the past few decades and looks to continue down that path for decades to come. In fact, in the near future, it could be “normal” for most children to only have one parent that they have any relationship with.
This should not be the case!!!
I am sure there are studies that reveal the many reasons for this fact, but I fear that it all boils down to the desire to keep families together.
I acknowledge that there are many legitimate reasons to not marry the mother or father of your child. I also acknowledge that there are legitimate reasons for spouses to divorce.
I am the product of a divorce. My mother divorced my father when I was five years old because she didn’t want me to grow up in the same household with my alcoholic father that abused her first son and daughter. My brother and sister are 19 and 16 years older than me, respectively, and they had a very different life than I did. For nearly two decades, my siblings witnessed my father coming home at five and getting stupid drunk by six. He also had a habit of smacking my brother’s head or beating him to get his attention (and whatever other reason he chose) until he got big enough to fight back, and it never happened again. No one should have deal with that.
Then I showed up. What a surprise! My mother claimed that I saved her. She had someone to love again. Her spirit had been broken for so long, she didn’t remember what loving a person was like until I came around. And let me tell you, that woman knew how to love. She found a way to make what was important to you to be important to her.
Then came the the fight. I was there. I didn’t know my mom was that strong! She had an arm too! They were both destroying the house, and each other, while I was hiding behind a 1968 burnt orange, fuzzy rocking chair scared out of my mind. The next thing I remember was living at my Aunt’s house until the divorce was final and we moved back into the house.
Years later my mother revealed all of this to me even though I remember bits and pieces.
I’m not here to condemn anyone for being single or divorced.
I am here to remind you that there is a bigger purpose than just you.
Sometimes, maybe more often than we recognize or would want to admit, we get caught up in feeling better for the moment, not realizing what is truly at stake. If we really had a vision for our family we would be more likely to exchange temporary pleasures and discipline ourselves for the good of our children, grandchildren and beyond.
My father was abused by an alcoholic who reminded him into his adulthood that his father didn’t want him. He was hurting. But instead of taking a stand and changing his path and making a better path for his children, he just chose to do the same thing. He did what was familiar, rather than what was best. And not knowing what is best isn’t a good excuse, because it’s a lie.
Fast forward to the the year 1998, Sarah and I had been married for five years and had been trying to have children and with no luck. However, in April of 1998 the Lord called me and I answered and a few short months later, we had conceived that baby boy.
Sarah was pregnant with our first son, Colton. We were excited about it and wanted him more than anything we could imagine. A few months into the pregnancy, I got scared and I said to myself, “I don’t know how to be a father! What am I going to do?”
And the Lord gently reminded me that I indeed knew how to be a father. I knew how to love but more importantly, I wanted to. I had a craving to love a child and raise that child thinking he was crazy because he was loved so much. In fact, that was what I had written in my marriage vows five and a half years earlier.
I was hungry to have a child of my own. I wanted to hug him and kiss him and squeeze him and call him George. Well I didn’t really plan on calling him George….LOL
But the Lord made it clear to me that I knew how to be a father just because it was something I wanted.
I know that many who will read this may not have been wanting a child when they conceived the child but you have her now. I am actually hoping there are many of you reading this because you are about to receive a great deal of hope.
Do you WANT to love your daughter?
Do you WANT to see your son grow up and have healthy, thriving family relationships?
Do you WANT to watch your daughter to grow up, never taking any disrespect from some good-for-nothing boy that just wants to get in her pants – BUT INSTEAD – knows how to identify a young man who wants to be committed to love her and care for her for rest of her life?
Do you WANT your son and his wife (your daughter-in-law) come to your home to honor you just for being his mother and give you the opportunity to love their children (your grandchildren)?
Do you WANT your grand daughter to visit you with her children (your great-grandchildren) just because of the legacy of love you have created so they can see it for themselves?
And I will help you do it.
The reason why RFV is necessary is because I want all of these for you and more. And I want it for your children….and I want it for your grandchildren.
Who can tell me that the Love of Christ that powerfully lives within me is only for myself? It is most certainly for my wife, my children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren and YOU.
Are you ready to work?